Smile Sunshine

Author's Notes: I wrote this short story about my father and I's relationship. Throughout all of the hard times we have gone through our relationship is finally starting to come back together.

I am a young fifteen year old girl blinded by my inner demons. I give people too many chances in life, far too many being granted to what some may call a father. This man in my life is an alcoholic and ever since he was remarried I never matter to him. No matter how many times he would be the cruelest person on this earth I always find a way to forgive him. Fifteen years ago I was adopted by this man and my mother. Throughout the course of my life, both split up multiple times but only coming back for me. Around the age of eight there was a full divorce splitting the two up forever, taking my heart and feelings with it. As my life went on I got the mentality of not being good enough for anyone, and I do not know if those evil thoughts will ever leave my mind. Soon, this man was remarried and my mom and I would somehow start our best friend relationship. Over the course of five years, this man slowly let go of me, as if I were a narcotic that rehab was pulling him away from.

On a snowy morning my mother allowed me to go to Kentucky with the girls. I packed my bags and smiled proudly at life ahead me. I took my steps into the future wanting to forget the past. One cynical man found a way to ruin happiness though, my father. On my way to a glorious vacation, I received a malicious text message. The message contained data of his words stating how horrible of a child I was, and how he did not want to be my father anymore. As with friends, I tried my best to brush the feelings forced upon me but, deep down my heart was falling apart piece by piece. Before this message had been sent multiple thoughts were racing through his brain. Finding out his daughter left for another state through her cheer team at a basketball game was one of the worst feelings in the world. This man stabbed alive. His baby girl was growing up rapidly, and he was not there to view and participate in any of the activities. Before the message, he also had a few too many drinks as well somehow making it seem this message was OK to send. Life was slowly being drained from him and lashing out was the only idea he thought was right.

He reminisced all the wondrous moments we spent together. Watching his new born baby blink with the most innocent eyes in the world, remembering his daughter stand up and attempt to walk for the first time, and having his daughter graduate kindergarten all ran through his mind. The thoughts just kept rolling, as if it were a scratched tape repeating itself. He remembered his daughter run up in to his arms and say, “Daddy, I love you,” and not hearing any of those words were devastating. All of her child years were the most important to him. Those were the times he was actually living the moments with me. When his wife tried to say, “Dave, everything is going to be fine,” he immediately shouted back, “NO, my daughter is too young to be travelling without me”. He did not want to come to the census of his own daughter growing up because he was not there for her as much as he wanted to be. Around midday he was confused, calmer, cheerless. He would do anything to receive his one and only child back into his life. This man acted as if his daughter was still in the state and he never did anything wrong.

Unknowing of what was to come, when I arrived home, I went to this man’s house to talk. Discouraged and slightly held back I still went in with a positive outlook. The demons inside pushed me to think one more chance would not hurt anyone. As I rang the door bell I saw a figure come to the door. Torn baseball cap, mahogany Docs, and his favorite football team apparel, this man slowly teeters open the door nervous for what was about to happen. Both of us braced ourselves for a discussion that would be the easiest to come in their life span. We looked into each other’s eyes and watched every moment between us, and soon the frame was distorted. It started to turn foggy and hazy; both of us had tears streaming down our face. Both realizing the mistakes we had made, wishing it could all be erased, I ran into his arms like a little child, and said, “Daddy, I love you”.

Mimic Lines from, An Occurrence At Owl Creek Bridge:

·         He unclosed his eyes and saw again the water below him

·         The sergeant stepped aside

·         By nightfall he was fatigued, footsore, famishing